How Cranky People Are Made

Hi Kiddo,
One of the more frequent things I used to say to your father was, "Well, I didn't pick you for your genes." Meaning, I had forgone my Darwinian instinct to select a mate for reproductive purposes when I started dating your father. Now I'm mildly confronted with the fact that I just may make a sprog with your asthmatic, bum-kneed, bad-backed, lame-thumbed father. Together we will create a near-sighted, short-tempered, anti-social, allergic, asthmatic kid with bad joints - that which is you.
Sorry about that.